


Tea and Biscuits

by teyla



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Gen, Originally Posted on LiveJournal, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-07
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-09-15 09:18:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9228506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teyla/pseuds/teyla
Summary: How the Doctor met God.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on [Livejournal](http://t-eyla.livejournal.com/259732.html) in 2009, beta'ed by euclase. Reposted here with slight edits.

The Doctor wasn't sure why the TARDIS had brought him here. Usually, when she decided to randomly change destinations, she'd bring him to a place where he was needed, or to a place where something was happening that she thought he should know about.

But this time, when he stepped out of his ship into the obtuse light of a warm summer evening, he saw God.

The eons hadn't left a trace on him. White hair, wrinkles around the eyes and a set of too-white dentures that flashed when he smiled, he could have easily been mistaken for any average septuagenarian. Not by the Doctor, obviously. The absence of time around God was a dead giveaway.

The old man straightened, interrupting his trimming of a young _Acer tegmentosum_ to shield his eyes against the sun. "Hello there, Doctor."

"Hello." The Doctor smiled, slipping his hands into his pockets as he looked around. The TARDIS had landed in a small, neatly kept garden, surrounded by flowers. There was a greenhouse to the right, a cottage to the left, and lovely green fields stretching out in every direction.

"Nice place you got here. Very--very neat." The Doctor nodded.

God smiled. "I do my best. Want to come in for a cup of tea?"

"Well. Why not?"

God slipped off the gardening gloves and retrieved his shears. He led the way to the small cottage, and the Doctor followed him inside into a cozy country kitchen that was as tidy as the garden. The table was set for two, with a steaming teapot, two mugs and a plate piled with biscuits.

The Doctor picked one up and smiled. "Oh, custard cream."

"I have a fondness for them. Please, sit."

As the Doctor sat down, the chair beneath him gave an ominous creak. He jiggled back and forth a bit, testing the stability, and the chair jiggled right along with him.

God sat down across from him and poured two mugs of tea. He added two sugars and a splash of milk to his own, then handed the creamer to the Doctor. "So, what are you up to these days?"

"Oh, you know." The Doctor dropped three small sugar cubes into his tea and imagined the hot water compromising their structural integrity until they dissolved at the bottom of the mug. "This and that. Keeping track of the universe."

"Anything interesting happening lately?"

"There's always something interesting happening in the universe."

God picked up a spoon and stirred his tea. The milk turned the dark liquid a light brown. "You're right," he said, "don't tell me. None of my business."

The Doctor snatched another biscuit off the plate and dipped it in his tea before he took a bite. "Earth has built another particle accelerator."

"Oh, have they?" God smiled. "Humans, they're so tenacious. How big is it?"

"17 miles in circumference. Took them over 25 years to build it, too." The Doctor sipped his tea; it was just right, just the way he liked it. "They want to generate 'micro-singularities' with it. Some of them think it's going to obliterate the planet."

God laughed, shaking his head. "Some day, it just might."

The Doctor smiled. He considered another biscuit but decided on another sip of tea instead. "How you've been?"

"Oh, you know. Same old same old. The begonias are coming along nicely, I've got them to turn a light blue now." God was still absentmindedly stirring his tea, the liquid in the mug swirling round and round following the movements of the spoon. "Although there's an occasional white one mixed in."

The Doctor nodded. A moment of silence followed, in which he watched the old man staring into space, presumably still thinking about begonias.

Finally, the Doctor finished his tea and got up, stealing another biscuit off the plate. "Well, I'd better be going."

"What? Oh, yes. Yes, of course." God got to his feet, brushing invisible crumbs off his shirt and smiling. "You're a busy man. I don't want to keep you."

"Yeah, that's me. Busy, busy, all the time." The Doctor grinned and shook God's hand. "It's fine, finish your tea, I can find my way out. Good luck with the begonias."

"Thanks. I'm sure I'll get there one day." God smiled and picked up his mug again. "Good luck to you, too, son. And be careful out there."

"I always am."

God snorted and made a shooing motion with his hand. "Off you go."

As the Doctor stepped outside, the lighting hadn't changed; it was still a warm summer evening. The air smelled of trees, and the lush grass was rippling in the light breeze.

The Doctor made his way across the lawn to the TARDIS and, without turning to take another look, stepped inside.

"Well then, old girl," he said as he walked up to the console. "Let's go and find out what the universe is up to, shall we?"

The TARDIS hummed at him, and the Doctor smiled as he engaged the randomizer.

Time to go and see what was out there.


End file.
